Okay so I write primarily Young Adult Novels and what is a
Young Adult Novel without even just a hint of romance, even just a teeny tiny
love sub-plot works. Romances are sub-plots in all my novels as the adventure,
the goal of the characters or the dangerous intrigue are the main-plots.
So when I write about my characters often times a romantic
element will pop up for said character, which some of those scenes are fun to
write but often leave me mortified as I want no one I know to read them, lol, but
I will leave this to my next Musings of a Lonely Writer segment
entitled, Musings of a Lonely Writer!
----- Minimalist Intimate Scenes Between Characters Mortify Me.
Any how so some of my favorite characters have had some
amazing romances, I mean the kind to make you swoon, even if a bit unrealistic,
cause who wants a totally realistic relationship in fiction all the time. I
love a far too perfect relationship than the ones that make it so real I hate
the characters for it, lol, as you can see I am not only complicated but picky
about what I like in a novel relationship.
Now we get to the real nitty-gritty center of things. So I
have had some amazing characters fall in love and though I do throw in some
troubles I tend to keep them perfectly in love and so maybe that has made me
dysfunctional in my thoughts of real relationships and love.
As part of my religion we don’t date until we are ready for
marriage. I always thought I would marry young and have kids young. As time
went by I didn’t find a man I wanted to date, I’ve been asked out but I was
young and wasn’t looking for anything serious and the guys were not of my
religion so I said no. So I will admit I have never been on a date and I am 27
years old.
Now my thoughts and views have changed on real relationships
and I am not sure I want one but at times I do, so way complicated I know, lol.
I know if I get in a relationship the guy will be nothing like my male heroes
in my novels and it sort of freaks me out.
I mean I know guys in real life are real, not fictional so I know they will
have faults, foibles, issues of all kinds but I mean who wouldn’t want to have
a guy be like the kind of guy in a novel!
My characters seem to not only be more out going they are
better in the way they live, love, raise families, ect. It’s a bit infuriating
but then again I do write about them so maybe I give them everything I don’t
have. In some ways I don’t want what they have but in other ways I kind of do.
I feel right now that I can’t handle dating a guy that is liable to be so real
I can’t stand it, lol.
Plus no guy I know even makes me want to think of dating
them and I gather they feel the same about me because it’s been ages since I
was last asked out. I started to even question if something was wrong with my
looks, personality ect. But who needs those worries in their life so I quickly
put it out of my head, well maybe not completely, lol!
***
So anyway I thought I would share
a bit about my Favorite Couple-
Princess Jadzia
Elizabeth Van ton and Jedrek. These two are two of my youngest couples and they
are in, “The Green Haven Series”. They I call my Romeo and Juliet couple
without all the dying.
Though I have had
many wonderful couples in my novels Jadzia and Jedrek take the top spot because
of the time and way their relationship blooms. It is a tumultuous time where
the kingdom they reside in is on the brink or war. Jadzia is a Princess of a
race that Jedrek’s race hates with a passion.
So when Jadzia and
Jedrek’s races try to band together it is a very tricky and dangerous thing.
Jadzia is young and helps Jedrek who feels older than his young age to finally
be able to be young and enjoy his youth. It starts as a friendship and then
progresses to more.
Jadzia and Jedrek
made me laugh and cry and feel as if I were really along with them on the
dangerous trip as Star Crossed Lovers who get a better ending than the couple
they copy, Romeo and Juliet. Jadzia and Jedrek get a seemingly content happily
ever after.
***
I used to be a hopeless
romantic *see definition below* but I’ve seen
so many friends and family members relationships end so badly it makes me
realize how real and hurtful it can be. Maybe that has damaged me or my view of
relationships and love. They tell me don’t let what happened to them stop me
but in a way it does because I don’t trust easily and I would hate to put trust
where it doesn’t belong or with someone who shatters my trust in them. So maybe
that is why my characters relationships are so good even when they lean a bit
toward realistic, because I don’t want my characters to suffer bad romances.
Maybe I am just so
confused about what I want and don’t want for myself but know fully what I want
and don’t want for my characters because with them its not real so no damage
done but in real life damage can be done.
** Here is the best definition of a Hopeless Romantic: This person is
in love with love. They believe in fairy tales and love. They're not to be
confused as stalkers or creepy because that's not what a hopeless romantic is.
All hopeless romantics are idealists, the sentimental dreamers, the imaginative
and the fanciful when you get to know them. They often live with rose colored
glasses on. They make love look like an art form with all the romantic things
they do for their special someone.
My View Years Ago
about being a Hopeless Romantic is: I liked to believe and hear love
stories, I loved to see people in love. I believed in fairy tales and hoped
some day to have a love story of my own to tell. I hoped, I dreamed and I thought
being a writer and avid reader led to me being more of a Hopeless Romantic.
My Views now: I still tend to believe in fairy tales and
true love as I know these kinds of relationships are a gift from Jehovah God
and should be viewed as a gift. I have just never really seen or experienced
the kind of love that would make me view myself any longer as a Hopeless
Romantic.
I don’t have rose colored glasses on, I view things the way
they are and sometimes that takes a toll on my stories. When I was younger the
sweet sentimental love played out in my novels and now my stories tend to go
darker in all aspects and the love is portrayed differently now. I often times
wish I could see the world and relationships as I did when I was 17 verses 27,
and that I could bring that to my stories again. **
Maybe these quotes
which I love can have more meaning for me and others.
To love
oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance. -- Oscar Wilde *Maybe
for now being okay and loving myself and what I have should be where I start
before I look for another to love me and for me to love them.*
Go confidently in the direction of
your dreams. Live the life you've imagined. - Henry David Thoreau *Maybe
I don’t want romance yet because there are still things or dreams I want to accomplish on my own before I start
a journey with another person. Things change and so maybe what I always
imagined having changed when I didn’t realize it. Maybe what the future holds
will be better then what I imagined at first.*
So maybe for now I
am slightly alright flying solo until I find some who makes me see reality is
better than fiction. A guy who makes me see how great real can be and who could
make my male heroes feel like they can’t hold a candle to him, lol! Someone to
start a journey with that will far outshine any journey my characters have
taken.
Or maybe I find out
a solo journey through life is all I will get and I should make the best of it.
Maybe exploring the world alone and embracing singleness is what I am to do. I
will just have to see where this life leads me. Being 27 years old is not the
end. I have many wonderful years ahead of me, and hopefully many wonderful
stories, characters, and characters journeys.
This has been
Musings of a Lonely Writer and until next time if you feel as I do about
feeling your characters have better love lives than you drop me a comment in
the comment section of this post, or if you simply have anything to say leave a
comment and I would be glad to read it. Remember to Keep Reading, Keep Writing,
Keep Inspiring, and above all Love Yourself
no matter your relationship status, love yourself the way you are now and don’t feel
bad if your characters have way better love lives, or at least come to accept
it as I have, lol!
You know, I'm 26 years old and I've never been on a date either. As a kid I was pretty shy and introverted and so it was easier for me to keep to myself, safe in my own little bubble. It was the worst thing I could have ever done for myself and now it seems to have become a habit I can't break. I use my characters to live through all that love and heartbreak. I've been living with them for so long, it's hard to imagine going through any of that with a real person. I guess I just wanted to say I know what you're going through because I'm there myself.
ReplyDeleteHow very interesting how similar in these respects we are. I have read about other bloggers who are writers too who are the same in a way as well. I think a lot of people have been introverted or something else and haven’t dated or live too much through their characters but they just often don’t admit it as they feel they are the only ones. That’s one reason I created my Musings of a Lonely Writer segments, to show other writers and bloggers you aren’t alone in the way you think, live, love, deal with your lives or characters lives, etcetera.
DeleteI felt the same as a kid I was shy and introverted and preferred to stay in my own little bubble. I never dated when I was younger as I said because of my religion but I had major crushes but I was so inside my own little world I never dared express it. Though having an active imagination I would act out in my mind finally telling my crush I liked him and he would like me back but then I would come back to reality, lol! So in essence I crushed from afar.
I found and bought this little plaque many years ago. I hung it in my bedroom and my friends; especially my fellow writer friend loves it too. It reads, I live in my own little world, but its okay, they know me there. I still to this day laugh when I read it and feel oh that is so true! LOL!
I feel the little world I inhabit is inhabited by my characters and they warmly welcome me ever time I dive into their worlds, lol, that sounds weird but there it is, brutal honesty, lol!
I feel the same way about my characters as you have read, I live through them a lot, include love and heartbreak as well. It's exciting and fun but a bit sad in a way to imagine not having what they have but I've come to accept that what I always wanted or assumed would have happened changes when you least expect it, it's the unexpectedness of life that is often fun, exciting, or sad, and lonely, or a bit of each at different times. I've learned to roll with the punches and just accept what comes my way.
Thanks for leaving a comment and letting me know you too are in the same boat as I am, so to speak, about this topic!